Numbers 1: Get Out Your Abacus

Synopsis:

God commands Moses to count all the men 20 years and older so they can prepare for war. They are to be counted by tribe.

Reuben - 46,500
Simeon – 59,300
Gad – 45,650
Judah – 74,600 (3 score 14 thousand and 600)
Issachar – 54,400
Zebulun 57,400
Joseph (Ephraim) – 40,500
Manasseh – 32,200
Benjamin – 35,400
Dan – 62,700 (3 score 2,00 and 700)
Asher – 41,500
Naphthali – 53,400

Total – 603,550

 The Levites were not includes in this number. The reason is because the Levites are in charge of the temple, they aren’t part of the army getting ready for war.

In other words:

One year after they left Egypt with 6,000 people – they counted up the men they have who can fight and they now have 603,500 men of fighting age – not including the women and children living in an encampment in the desert.

Why I think these numbers are wrong:

First, the largest city in Egypt at this time probably had 40,000 to 60,000 people in it (Memphis or Thebes). So having an encampment 10 times the size of a huge city isn’t likely.

Second: 603,500 is a city the size of Denver CO. It’s a huge number. And this is only the fighting age men. In reality – to support them and to include the women – you probably had double that so close to 1.2 million people – which is a city the size of Dallas Texas – living in an encampment in the desert.

Third: Even with a really robust sexual propagation program and including the slaves these people probably took with them, it’s unlikely you could get a 100 fold increase of people in 1 year.

What now makes sense about Leviticus

Even if the number of people in the encampment was a fraction of this number, it does explain why they had so many rules about cleanliness. The logistics of keeping feces out of your drinking water and taking away waste and getting clean water and preventing the spread of disease in an encampment of this size would have been enormous.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Always double check your numbers (Numbers 1)

Numbers 2: Pitch Your Tent

Synopsis:

God tells Moses and Aaron where everyone should pitch their tents in relationship to the Tabernacle.  For the record here is how the encampment was laid out:

East of the Tabernacle: (186,400 men – 1st rank)
Judah (Nashon is captain)
Issachar (Nethaneel is captain)
Zebulum (Eliab is captain)

South of the Tabernacle: (151,450 men – 2nd rank)
Reuben (Elizur is captain)
Simeon (Shelumiel is captain)
Gad (Eliasaph is captain)

The Levites are to camp around the Tabernacle and take care of it – so they are in the center

West of the Tabernacle: (108,100 men – 3rd rank)
Ephraim (Elishama is captain)
Manesseh (Gamliel is captain)
Benjamin (Abidan is captain)

North of the Tabernacle: (157,600 men – 4th rank)
Dan (Ahiezer is captain)
Asher (Pagiel is captain)
Naphtali (Ahira is captain)

In other words:

The armies are organized and people are given their sleeping assignments.

Favorite bit:

That the numbers add up correctly.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Stay organized. Everything has it’s place.(Numbers 2)

Numbers 3: The Levites get their assignments

Synopsis:

The Levites belong to God so he wants every male child over 1 month counted. Here are their numbers, assignments regarding care of the Tabernacle and where they are to sleep. There are 22,000 males over 1 month old, except that there are more like 22,273 males, except that the numbers counted add up to 22,300.

Gershon Family: 7,500
Sleep west of the Tabernacle.
Chief is Eliasaph.
Responsible for Tent and door hangings and cords

Kohath Family: 8,600
Sleep south of the Tabernacle
Chief is Elisaphan
Responsible for care of Ark, table, candlesticks, altars and vessels.

Merari Family: 6,200
Sleep north of the Tabernacle
Chief is Zuriel
Responsible for boards, pillars and sockets

Moses and Aaron:
Sleep east of the Tabernacle
Responsible for the Sanctuary – kill any stranger that comes nigh


The last bit of this chapter is confusing because the odd number over 22,000  (273) is given 5 shekels each  1,365  and this money is given to Aaron and his sons.

In other words:

The Levites are given their assignments.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Double check your math (Numbers 3)

Numbers 4: Levite workers are counted:

Synopsis:

Only the men between the ages of 30 and 50 are allowed to do the work servicing the temple and it has to be done in a very specific way lest they accidentally touch the holy things and die.  Here are the numbers of workers from each family.

Kohath  - 2,750
Gershon  - 2,630
Merari – 3,200

Total – 8,580

In other words:

Only Levites 30 to 50 can work on the Tabernacle.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 4:15 – The sons of Kohath shall come to bear it: but they shall not touch any holy thing, lest they die. None of the other Levites are threatened this way. This must be because they have to bear the altar and all the gold stuff which is actually worth something. Aaron is to oversee everyone’s work and make sure everything is ready to be transported before the Kohath’s come in because if they see the holy things, they will die. Pretty sure – they don’t want their pretty things to get stolen.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Make sure everyone knows what they are supposed to be doing (Numbers 4:19)

Numbers 5: The Law of Jealousy

Synopsis:

All the lepers are to be cast out of the camp and if a man is jealous of his wife and thinks she is cheating on him with another man but can’t prove it, he is to bring her to the priest with an offering or barley and frankincense and the priest shall take dust from the floor of the tabernacle and put it in water and curse the woman telling her – drink this – if you are defiled, your belly will swell and your thighs will rot. If you are clean, you will be fine. This curse is written in a book, then blotted out with water. Part of the offering is then burnt upon the altar and the woman is made to drink the dirt filled water so everyone can see what happens next.

In other words:

Men who are jealous of their wives but can’t prove they are unfaithful can ask the priest to test the wives by making them drink dirty water to see if they get sick. If they do, they were defiled. If they don’t, they are declared innocent.

My impressions of this as a woman:

Obviously, this is unfair to the women. After all husbands can get mad and try to kill their wives this way.  On the other hand, drinking dirt filled water isn’t guaranteed to kill you, so I suppose you do have a chance of surviving. Still, I would not want to live under this sort of law where without proof, a husband can threaten my life.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Jealousy can make people do REALLY stupid things (Numbers 5)

Numbers 6: The Nazarite Vow

Synopsis:
People are allowed to take a vow of abstinence known as an Nazarite vow, where they vow to abstain from drink and dirty things during a set period of time. They are not allowed to cut their hair or touch dead things even if it is a family member during this time. When they are done, they are considered holy to the lord. After the vow is complete, you shave your head and bring birds to the priest as well as a lamb, some unleavened bread, flour, oil and a meat and drink offering.  The hair from the head shaving is to be burned as a peace offering.

In other words:

Vows of abstinence are allowed as a way to bring you closer to God.

Favorite bit:

Accommodations are made if a family member dies.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Deprive yourself of the finer things in life now and again. It’s good for you. (Numbers 6)

Numbers 7: The Tabernacle is Set Up

Synopsis:

Moses sets up the Tabernacle and all the princes of the tribes of Israel bring offerings to the tabernacle. 6 wagons and 12 bulls to pull them – are divided to Merari and Gershon families to help them cart the tabernacle around. The Kohath get nothing because they have to carry the altar etc on their shoulders. The numbers of other offerings made by the various tribe amounts to: 12 chargers of silver, 12 silver bowls and 12 golden spoons. That is equivalent of 2,400 shekels of silver and 120 shekels of gold. There were also 12 bulls, 12 rams, 12 lambs and 12 kids for burnt offerings. The peace and sacrifice offers were 24 bulls, 60 rams, 60 lambs and 60 goats. When Moses goes into the Tabernacle – he hears a voice speaking from the Mercy seat that is on top of the Ark.

In other words:

Everyone gives their offerings to the tabernacle and Moses hears voices.

Favorite bit:

That the book of Numbers really is about numbers.

Next favorite bit:

Numbers 7:89 Moses hearing the voice of God from the Mercy seat.

Least favorite bit:

That this chapter goes on for 89 verses!  It’s seriously long. Thankfully, they give us a synopsis of the offerings in 84-88 because this chapter lists every single offering in the order it was given – which is the same for each prince so it’s really repetitious.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Make good on your promises (Numbers 7)

Numbers 8: The Levites get Shaved

Synopsis:

God orders all the Levites to be washed, bodies shaved and clothes cleaned and brought before the tabernacle for an offering. Basically, Since all the first born of Israel belong to God because of what he did in Egypt, instead of taking the first born, he takes the Levites instead who service God and the congregation as priests that way there will be no plague upon the children of Israel. Every Levite from 25 to 50 has to serve the congregation.

In other words: 

God takes the Levites in trade for all of the first born of Israel – calls it even.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 8:6 – Sprinkle water of purity upon them, and let them shave all their flesh, and let them wash their clothes, and so make themselves clean. Can’t help but imagine 8,500 -ish hairy men shaving their chests, arms, heads, legs and private parts to “clean” themselves for God. A bath clearly wasn’t enough.

Least favorite bit:

Numbers 8:24,25 – In Numbers 4 – the ages of service are 30 to 50 and here it is 25 to 50. Which is it? Hmmm?  All the others numbers so far add up. The numbers relating to the Levites don’t.

Other least favorite bit:

That this entire thing is a bit of a scam really. You pay us to take care of the tabernacle and that is our only job. And you should thank us because otherwise your first born would have to do it.  Scam!

Moral Lesson Learned:

Keep yourself clean (Numbers 8)

Numbers 9: Passover under a cloud

Synopsis:

Fourteenth day of the first month of the 2nd year after Egypt, it’s time for Passover, which is celebrated. Except there were some men who were defiled by a dead body and they weren’t sure what they should do. Moses speaks to God and they are told to celebrate Passover anyway. Everyone is to celebrate it regardless of where you are.  The tabernacle was set up and cloud descended upon it by day and by night it had the appearance of fire.  Whenever the cloud was there, they pitched their tents. Whenever the cloud was gone, they journeyed.

In other words:

They celebrate Passover for a 2nd time.

What I think really happened:

Regarding this whole cloud over the tabernacle that is a cloud by day and a fire by night, and when it is there, they sit in their tents and when it is gone, they journey thing. The altar at the center of the tabernacle is a GRILL!  If they are burning things on the grill, under the Mercy seat – there is a cloud of smoke. And yeah – at night, it would look like fire, because it WAS fire. No miracles here. Moving on.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 9:6-10 – the men who were defiled by a dead body asking what they should do about Passover. I like that it is a reasonable question to ask given the circumstances.

Least favorite bit:

That the whole journey or don’t journey cloud thing was so clearly a sham, predicated on the whims of Moses and Aaron but given the force of God for everyone else.

Moral Lesson Learned:

It is good, on occasion, to rest and do nothing. (Numbers 9)

Numbers 10: Marching Along

Synopsis:

2 silver trumpets were made to be able to signal to the armies of Israel. Then on the 20th day of the 2nd month of the 2nd year out of Egypt, the cloud lifted and the children of Israel could begin their journey from Sinai to Paran. We are then given the order of the march: Judah, Issachar, Zebulun, Gershon and Merari (with the Tabernacle), Reuben, Simeon, Gad, Kohathites (bearing the sanctuary and ark), Ephraim, Manasseh, Benjamin, Dan, Asher and Napthali. Moses asks his brother in law Hobab to join them on the journey. Hobab says no, we’re going home. Moses pleads, not sure whether Hobab joined them or not.

In other words:

They move their camp from Sinai to Paran.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 10: 29-32 – where Moses tries to convince his brother-in-law to join them.  As I read this, I thought that Hobab was smart to say no. Conditiongs could not have been good.

Least favorite bit:

Numbers 10:35,36 – Moses tells God, when they are moving camp – Rise up Lord, and let thine enemies be scattered: and let them that hate thee flee before thee.  Even though I like the alliteration, I dislike the idea that they wanted God to kill people.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Stay away from cults (Numbers 10:29)

Numbers 11: Fire and Food Poisoning.

Synopsis:

The people complain and God gets angry and starts a fire that kills a bunch of people. That place is called Taberah. Others complain that they are hungry and are tired of eating manna (which is the size of a coriander seed) and they complain, once again, that they were better off in Egypt where they had fish, and juicy cucumbers and melons and leeks and onions and garlic. Moses and God are angry and Moses complains to God – why did you put me in charge of these people. It would have been better if you just killed me! God says, bring me 70 people to talk to. Tell everyone to sanctify themselves and I will give them so much meat they will be sick of it. They will have meat for a month.  So, the 70 elders are called and they start prophesizing. However, 2 men in the camp also start prophesizing and Joshua (who is Moses’ servant) tells him to stop them. Moses responds by wishing everyone could talk to God directly. At which point God provides a bunch of quails which fall dead out of the sky into the camp. But when people start to eat them God gets mad and gives them deadly food poisoning. This place was called Kibrothhat taavah because that is where they buried the people with food poisoning. The rest of the congregation travels on to Hazeroth.

In other words:

There is a fire in the camp. A bunch of people die. Others complain of having to eat Manna. Moses complains that he hates being in charge of all these complainers. God provides quails to eat but then gives everyone food poisoning and a bunch of people die. Moving on. The congregation moves on.

Favorite bit: 

Numbers 11:15 – Where Moses complains that the burden is too much and he would rather die than bear it.

Next favorite bit:

Numbers 11: 5 This is the start of the complaint against eating manna. It’s nice because it’s so detailed.

What’s obvious?

That this large of a group is not safe. There are very real health and safety issues and people were dying, in large numbers.

Moral Lesson:

• Don’t eat road kill, it will give you food poisoning (Numbers 11:33)
• Fire safety important (Numbers 11:1)

Numbers 12: A plot is foiled

Synopsis:

Miriam and Aaron conspire against Moses because he apparently had married an Ethiopian woman. God gets mad and scolds Miriam telling her that He will speak to who He wants and then He gives Miriam a bout of leprosy. Aaron begs Moses to ask God to forgive Miriam and heal her. He does, but He makes Miriam shut out from camp for 7 days. Afterward they moved camp to the wilderness of Paran.

In other words:

Miriam conspires against Moses and fails.

Favorite bit: 

That Moses married an Ethiopian. (Numbers 12:1)

Second favorite bit:

That this plot was only possible because of how meek Moses was (Numbers 12:3)

What’s unclear:

Whatever this skin condition was, it wasn’t leprosy as that doesn’t clear up in 7 days.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Don’t gossip behind people’s back (Numbers 12)

Numbers 13: Eek! Giants!

Synopsis:

Moses sends spies out to search the land of Canaan, which God had promised to them. One man from every household went. The only ones that are important are Caleb who is of the tribe of Judah, son of Jephuneh and Joshua (Oshea) son on Nun, tribe of Ephraim. They are supposed to see how strong the inhabitants are. Do they live in walled cities or in tents. What kind of food and wood is in this land.  So these men went from Zin unto Rehob and to Hamath. It turns out that the children of Anak were there (these are the giants). But they did take samples of the plants and brought them back to Moses. Their report is basically good. The land floweth with milk and honey. Caleb encourages everyone to go and possess the land. All the other princes say no. The people are too strong and besides, they have giants. We can’t fight them.

In other words

They think about invading Canaan, but decide against it because of the giants that live there.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 13:33 “And there we saw the giants, the sons of Anak which come of the giants: and we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight.”

Makes You Wonder:

How big exactly were these giants?

Interesting bit:

Numbers 13:25  And they returned from searching of the land after 40 days. That must be a significant number. 40 days was the time Noah spent in the rain.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Do your research (Numbers 13)

Numbers 14: Woe is us

Synopsis:

The congregation whines – we should have stayed in Egypt. God has had enough of the whining. He wants to kill everyone except for Caleb and Joshua and Moses and Aaron and give them a fresh congregation to work with. Moses asks him not to. So instead he only kills the princes who had spied on the land and spoke against invasion. Caleb and Joshua were spared because they advocated for invasion. Everyone else over the age of 20 is condemned to die in the wilderness and God will allow their children to enter into the land of Canaan 40 years from now. The people repent and agree to go in, but it is too late. God is pissed and everyone who tries is killed by the Amalekites and Canaanites who dwell in that land.

In other words:

The people complain, yet again, and God kills a bunch of them in anger.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 14:2 0 Would God that we had died in the land of Egypt! or would God we had died in this wilderness!

Second Favorite bit:

That Moses talks God out of killing everyone by telling him, look – if you kill everyone, it will be seen as a failure. You are the leader. If you have to kill all your followers, you aren’t a very good leader. Let them live. (Numbers 14:13-16) The best part is the God buys this argument.

Least favorite bit:

Numbers 14:40-45 – Too little too late. We’re sorry – we’ll do what you want – oops – all dead.

My moral commentary on this chapter: 

I have mixed feelings about the whininess of the congregation. They are acting like normal humans. I can totally understand God’s frustration with them, on the other hand, I’m a parent. And as a parent, yeah – sometimes you have to threaten to take away a child’s reward to get them to comply with your wishes. But when they comply, you should reward them. Punishing them with death for finally complying because they took a while to get with the program seems counterproductive to me.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Don’t blame your followers for your failure of leadership (Numbers 14)

Numbers 15: Try to Remember

Synopsis:

God tells Moses what sort of offerings he wants his congregation to make to him when they finally go into the land He has promised them. But because they are likely to forget, he provides rules on how to atone for forgetting and rules for how to atone for strangers who don’t know the rules. Then he tells them all to put blue fringe on all their garments so they don’t forget the rules.

In other words: 

God orders everyone to wear blue fringe so they don’t forget how to offer Him sacrifices when they finally arrive in Canaan 40 years hence.

Favorite bit:

That it’s basically understood that everyone is going to forget these rather detailed rules of what animals to sacrifice exactly how 40 years from now so they have to wear blue fringe on their clothes to remind them. (Numbers 15:38)

Least favorite bit:

I admit – I basically skipped over the details of exactly what has to be sacrificed in what order and how and where and with what sort of flour and bread.

Moral Lesson:

Find ways to remind yourself of important things (Numbers 15)

Numbers 16: An Uprising is Put Down

Synopsis:

Korah gathers 250 princes to rise up against Moses and Aaron. the complaint is that you took us out of a land of milk and honey promising us another land of milk and honey and now you tell us we can’t have that new land and you are keeping us here in the desert because you want to be in charge of all of us. Moses tells them all – look – if you want to serve God directly, go ahead, but ... if he doesn’t want to deal with you, he’ll kill you. So, take your chances. Korah and his men show up with brass censers for incense. God is really mad and tells everyone that doesn’t want to die to get away from Korah. Moses informs the congregation if these men aren’t going to die a common death. The ground is going to open up and swallow them. Which it does. It swallows up every tent belonging to Korah and his men. A fire then envelops the 250 men who followed Korah. The brass censers are taken and a memorial built out of them for the altar. The next day, everyone who murmured against Moses was killed by God, a total of 14,700 people in addition to the 250 that died during the incidence with Korah.

In other words: 

A group of 250 men rise up against Moses and Aaron and God kills them and their followers.

Favorite bit:

Numbers 16:29 – to prove that this is God and not Moses, the deaths of the usurpers won’t be a common one.

Second favorite bit:

The entire chapter – I love that something interesting happened. Finally.  Intrigue, plots that bring disaster.

Least favorite bit:

That almost 15,000 people died in this uprising.

Moral Contemplation:

Even with God on their side and with visible and rather obvious examples of his power, Moses and Aaron still don’t command the respect of their followers. The conditions in this camp must have been horrid enough for this sort of intrigue to keep happening. Even Aaron and his sister had plotted against Moses at one point. He’s not a very good leader.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Respect isn’t automatic. It has to be earned. (Numbers 16)

Numbers 17: A Blossom Fell

Synopsis:

To quell the murmurings and rebellions, Moses asks every tribe to provide a rod with the name of one prince. Moses ads a rod for Aaron. They leave it in the tabernacle overnight. The one that blossoms is God’s chosen. Lo and behold, the only one that has blossomed is Aarons. His rod is to be kept as a testament against the rebels. Everyone else complains that they have been condemned to die, which they basically have.

In other words:

To quell the uprising, Moses makes a rod blossom.

Favorite bit:

That this test is so easy to fake. Moses chooses the rods to be used. All he had to do was choose to give a rod to Aaron that would blossom and ones that wouldn’t to everyone else.

Least favorite bit:

That this doesn’t really stop the complaining. (Numbers 17:12,13)

Moral Lesson Learned:

It’s important to know when to fold your hand. (Numbers 17)

Numbers 18: Payment for Service

Synopsis: 

God tells Aaron that all the stuff that is given to the tabernacle actually belongs to him and to the children of Levi. All the meat, all the bread, all the best oils, all the money belongs to them. It is their payment for dedicating themselves to the care of the tabernacle. The only exception is the firstling of the cows. Those are to be slaughtered and their blood sprinkled on the altar. But aside from that. Everything given in offering belongs to the Levites. Oh – except 1/10th of the money – that goes to the tabernacle.

In other words:

God tells the Levites how they are to be paid. Hint, everything that is given to the tabernacle in offering belongs to them.

Favorite bit: 

Numbers 18:17 – where the firstling cows are exempted from what Levites can claim as their own.

Least favorite bit:

Numbers 18;26 – where they have to give to the temple 1/10th of the tithes they collect from the children of Israel. It is very clear this is a financial scam that makes it so the Levites never have to do real work. Not really.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Make sure you know how you are being paid. (Numbers 18)

Numbers 19: Killing a Red Cow To Clean The Dead

Synopsis:

God commands that a red cow without blemish be given to Eleazor who is to take the cow out of the camp and to slay her, then take her blood and sprinkle it directly before the tabernacle. The other person shall then burn the cow completely down to ashes. At which point they are to clean their clothes and take a bath. Another person who is already clean is to take the ashes and put them in a clean place so they will be available to people to use to cleanse themselves if they touch a dead body. The rest of the chapter explains the rules of using the ashes of the cow as “water of separation” to clean yourself after coming in contact with someone who is dead. It comes down to this. Three days after someone dies, you have to clean yourself with the “water of separation” which is the ashes of the dead cow, and then on the 7th day you will be considered “clean” again.

In other words:

The ashes of a dead burned cow are used to clean away disease that might come from touching or handling a dead body.

Favorite bit:

Don’t have one. This chapter is a little wierd. I understand the need to have some rules to keep disease transmission at bay after a death, I just don’t get how the ashes of a dead cow would help.

Moral Lesson Learned:

Be careful around dead people, they can carry disease (Numbers 19)

Numbers 20: Edom refuses passage

Synopsis:

The congregation move on to the Desert of Zin into Kadesh. Miriam dies. There is no water here so the people complain and Moses asks God for help and he has him break open a rock to reveal a spring. Moses sends out an envoy to the King of Edom. Tells him we are related and we would like to pass through your territory peacefully. The Kingdom of Edom refuses them passage so they turn away and journey to Mount Hor. God decides it’s time for Aaron to die and asks Moses to take him up to the top of Mount Hor, strip Aaron of his clothes and give them to his son Eleazor, which he does. And Aaron dies.  Everyone mourns for 30 days.

In other words:

They go to the desert, everyone complains of lack of water and Miriam dies. Moses finds a spring and tries to get permission to pass through the Kingdom of Edom and is refused. Everyone ends up at the base of Mount Hor where Aaron dies.

Favorite bit: 

(Numbers 20: 2-5) Why did you bring us here? We should have died with everyone else. Why did we let you talk us into going into the desert? We’re all going to die. We should have stayed in Egypt!

Least favorite bit:

(Numbers 20:14-22) That the King of Edom didn’t give them passage through his lands. I can understand why. A group of anywhere from 60,000 to 600,0000 people is a HUGE number of people. They can’t just pass through. It’s would be like allowing a huge group of religious zealot refugees passage through your land. Not a group most rulers would be willing to trust.

Moral Lesson Learned:

(Numbers 20: 11) Always make sure you have a source of clean water.
(Numbers 20:20-21) Never trust large groups of zealots